January 30, 2009
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Our love is something different. We have movie love.
There is a really special thing that I like to call Movie Love. It's pretty much self explanitory. A love similar to that which can be found in movies.
I'm not really one to care for romantic comedies unless I know it's going to be something really spectacular.
To start off, here are some of my favorite lovey-dovey type movie things (in no particular order) that I sometimes watch when the mood strikes:
- When Harry Met Sally - The story about how some guys and girls can never be "just friends". I think we all can some way or another relate to this.
- Say Anything - John Cusack is definitely one of my celebrity crushes. This is an amazing movie about young love. Ahhhh... to be young and in love again. I wish Lloyd Dobbler were real.
- Enchanted - Disney but still.
- What Women Want - I haven't seen this one actually but I'm recommeding it because I know it's that good.
First point I'd like to make, everyone's taste is different. Clearly, not everyone falls for the same guy or girl (Unless you count Easa because he's every girl's dream guy... I hope he doesn't read this). What I would like my movie love to be might not be your idea of movie love at all. In fact, it could be totally opposite!
Why do we want to be in love like this? Because it mostly always works out in the end. The protagonist always ends up with their love interest. You could even say that it was destiny that brought them together. Sometimes, we turn to these types of movies in hopes that our real-life counterparts can work things out this easily. Unfortunately, most relationship problems don't work out over the course of an hour and a half. If that were the case, we'd all marry our high school sweethearts.
Most romance stories have distorted my view of how the real world should be. I didn't know it then but my last relationship has turned me into quite a cynic. I don't think there's anything wrong with that though. Being a cynical person cushions the fall a little bit when the people you love the most let you down. Movie love is a great escape from the real world and allows us to fantasize about something so wonderful that someone would want to write a movie about-- one that millions will watch and cry over. In the end, you'll want to be careful when it comes to picturing your perfect romance because things may not turn out the way you'd expect and you'll soon find that it would have helped if your judgement wasn't clouded by that image John Cusack standing outside your bedroom window with a boom box.
Sadly, we all have to experience a heartbreak of some sort. I think it shows us all how much we really love someone or something and we can take that experience and learn from it.
Comments (79)
I wrote a post on this: http://www.xanga.com/youandwhosearmy/686154177/romantic-farce/
I haven't read it in a while...but I thought of it when I read this...
Sometimes I worry that I am in "movie love" right now, that truths are not being expelled from each party...it is hard to be happy in relationships sometimes when there is the threat of "movie love".
Me Me Me
Haha...I think it is alright for you to have a little cynicality to relationships, relationships are best when both parties get what they want...
I wanted my damndest to call you out on those movies being box office flops, but all of them, ALL OF THEM, made in the 40 millions at the box office. I thought atleast Kate and Leopold starring my man Wolverine would have been a hit that you overlooked. I guess audiences all knew Wolverine could do MUCH better than Meg Ryan so the movie was unbelievable. Why would Wolvy take Billy Crystal's sloppy seconds?
@EndlessMike03 - yeah they all were pretty sucessful actually. Everyone's a sucker for love. Stupid.
I'll just call them Wynn office flops... how 'bout that?
i have yet to watch harry met sally but enchanted is one of my favourite movies!!! i do like PS i love you. it had me bawling!
I saw the title of this post and immediately saw Janice holding Chandler's face in her hands and saying goodbye. And I agree with the Easa factor until I was snapped out of it on that fateful steak night.
But you're right, everybody has their different opinions and desires when it comes to love. Me, I'd love for somebody to put the effort into helping me check things off my life list. That part of A Walk to Remember gets to me every time I watch it.
And I'm glad to see you finally agree with me in admitting that you've become cynical. And you're right, there's nothing wrong with that. Do what I do to battle the cynicism: read romance novels.
Great post Wynn.
"In the end, you'll want to be careful when it comes to picturing your perfect romance because things may not turn out the way you'd expect and you'll soon find that it would have helped if your judgement wasn't clouded..."
i have no doubt my idea of movie romance will not turn out the way i expected but even so i cant help but hold on to the idea that even in the real world its possible to find. And on top of that movie romance isn't suppose to cloud your judgment its suppose to be a guide, a standard for all your relationships, that way you don't have to judge the next from the last, working up until you find that right someone but instead knowing right off that this could be fun, it could be wild, it could be an adventure but its not the real deal...
"Unfortunately, most relationship problems don't work out over the course of an hour and a half. If that were the case, we'd all marry our high school sweethearts."
funny you should bring that up because add in a couple years, a couple relationships, the high school sweethearts together in the end and only film the highlights and you've got yourself a damn good movie...
i guess my point is don't give up on movie romance or else you'll end up dating a bunch of bums who steal money from your purse to buy parts for a methlab that they built in the bottom of your parents house... what? it could happen...
@Sammi - Friends is where I got the title idea from. And I love that part in a Walk to Remember too.
@JunggleMan - I like the way you think, jungleman. Why dont you tell me some of your favorite movies in this genre?
@Alpha_May - I actually have 'PS I love you' at home but have never bothered to watch it. I'll find time to watch it soon and let you know what I think!
Very sweet!
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Are you a film major?
i have not seen any of th emovies that you've mentioned above haha
Great post! So true.
Everyone wants love. Shame.
What Women Want is one of my favs.
Great post.
Hope you don't mind, I'm subscribing
hopeless romanticism
we all need a little bit
I LOVE say anything. It's amazing.
This has nothing to do with the post, but is that Boulevard Park you're at in the top left picture?
Sometimes life can be too busy and realistic that it wears us out.
Those movies like that give us something to refresh, to push, to hope, and to restart.
That's how I see it, although I do hate, it's becoming a boring trend.
My wife and I, we've got a thing that's called radar love.
I hated A Walk to Remember.
Lol
@stuartandabby: radar love? cute.
i personally don't believe in movie love, at least not for real life.
but there's nothing wrong with watching a sappy movie and enjoying it.
i actually like kate and leopold ~
50 First Dates
^ My favorite.
Aww, I actually liked Just Like Heaven.
wow... your blog caught my attention because my ex bf and i used to call our love a "movie love." and his fave movies are say anything and when harry met sally.... very nice coincidence.
.
I am one of those who wants the type of love Noah has to give from the notebook.
I have to see "Say Anything"! I'm very excited, actually. A romance that is beautiful as well as realistic I would say, is "Pretty In Pink". It's very lovely! I also love "The Notebook".
This entry reminded me of an article I read some months ago about a study that showed that Hollywood's romance movies were ruining relationships by skewing people's perspective on love.
http://tinyurl.com/7fg2h7
Of course, it's not a definitive study or anything considering the small sample size and such, but it was a fun read and honestly not too surprising.
I have to totally agree. I love the end of when Harry met Sally. That would be my perfect marriage proposal
The "Just like heaven" song was really nice. And I think the movie was also. I like You've got mail compared to When Harry met Sally, and City of Angels was also great.
I've always considered The Notebook and The Lake House to be two of the most wonderful love movies ever. They might not really happen in real life, but at least they're not cheesy.
And of course, I won't ever forget Atonement. Pretty sad, but it is both a literary masterpiece as well as a really great movie.
@ RoastedMarshmallow: I do agree, I mean sometimes people need something to aspire, to hope for. I know I do.
and I actually liked Kate and Leopold. =]
I haven't heard it expressed in quite this way, but I've definitely been guilty of wanting "movie love." My two favorite lovey dovey movies would have to be City of Angels and The Notebook. Love, as portrayed in those movies, is unbelievably amazing, but I'd like to hope that that kind of love exists in reality too. Maybe I'm being dumb and hoping for stupid things, but hey, you never know!
you have officially entertained me. And I'm subscribed now. lol.
Being a cynical person cushions the fall a little bit when the people you love the most let you down
Absolutely!!
I think movies are the problem with society today!!! Our culture is saturated in this fantasy world of drama that it has to become reality for us to 'truely' experience love. I think TV and movies have dumbed down society, and redefined love as a superficial, fleeting emotion. Maybe that's why divorce rates are so damn high.
oh john cusack....... i will always love him.
too bad in real life most of the love stories end up like The Terminal...the good guy gets shot down and the girl goes for the jerk...
Wow this is completely how I feel too. :]
A movie that comes to the top of my head is one i watched recently.
Last night i watched A Beautiful Mind for the first time, all the way through.
I cried a lot... lol
Because what I want in my "perfect relationship or marriage" is being able to over come problems that are hard to handle, and not falling out of love.
but I'm not saying I want my lover to be crazy.
I just want us to be willing to do what it takes to stay in love.
But that would probably be true love. :]
Just Like Heaven is my number one favotire song!
The Cure is also my favorite band.
So it's on my life sound track as well. :]
But I think I got teary during that movie too, but it was good I know that.
I also love all those movies listed. the enchanted is okay, but not one of my favs. I still liked it.
I realised a few talking about A Walk To Remember... for some reason that movie didn't get to me... at all.
I haven't watched it since I was 13, but I remember it.
I was the only one of my friends who didn't cry... something about it though.
it's sad, but not my kind of love movie.
Great post though!
I haven't watched enough romantic comedies to dislike any. I like every romantic comedy that I've watched so far.
@wynnw - i guess the reason why i like PS I LOVE YOU so much is because of the reasons you mentioned in your post. how that love just seemed so perfect. at the time i was watching it, it was during the roughest parts of my marriage and all the while i was wondering...is it possbile to be really loved like that? is any man capable of that type of devotion?
anyways yeah..looking forward to reading what you think.
when harry met sally and say anything are my two absolute favorite movies. The lines they use are real and the lessons in love are pretty realistic. The endings are very Americanized (we like happy endings) but the lessons aren't less true. great post!
i really like your post!
Good post, this one and it's sequel. I agree.
A Lot Like Love's a really good one. i thought it was at least a little realistic. x]
'Enchanted' is way more unrealistic than those other movies you mentioned, which by the way were actually really successful and were very entertaining.
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that was a great post
and definitely i think realizing that reality is nothing like movies cushions the fall.
Aw.. I personally love "Love Actually." It's just too darn cute!
Your post caught my attention, mostly because you're right about distorted reality. I've always been a sucker for romance, and each time I fall for someone, it seems like they have to live up to my idea of romance, that has been formulated by romance novels, movies and just a dream of what I've always felt I deserved.. ya know?
It's funny though.. there are times when I am with my boyfriend now, and there are those moments when I say "the little things we do and say, it would be the cutest romance movie ever." Because it would!
random, but great post : )
i liked all of the above but some of my favorites are Notting Hill, French kiss and of course you cant leave out the classics like Pretty women and my best friends wedding... Okay i admit I'm something of a Julia Robers fan... either way all great movies...
I had a movie-love relationship. But I didn't know it was really a thriller/drama
hahah
now I'm a bit cynic, but I would rather believe in movie-love. Just happily ever after- 'cause SOME ppl do have it! (even if they are a few generations above us) But if they could- shouldn't we be able to have the "one true love"??
Oh btw, this was a good entry
@JunggleMan -
oh man i even forgot to say P.S. i love you and city of angles, sleepless in Seattle, you've got mail all those classics... but after reading everyones comments I'm just so down... i mean really people how about you take it back to 7th grade when you were all giddy girls and didn't realize that you should have to settle for something less, something the past 7-10 years has made you believe is acceptable because its the norm, really doesn't make me feel very sorry for you when you end up with all the jerks out there. how about you all take two steps back take a real good look at the world and raise the damn bar... it might take a couple lonely nights but hell you'll probably have those anyway!
My favorite line from "When Harry Met Sally" was at the end when Billy Crystal said "When you finally find the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible."
To this day.. still one of my favorite movies
Great post! I love When Harry Met Sally
say anything = <33333
john cusack is a total babe.
i actually read through this post.
and the romedy (yes, romantic comedies) nausea is coming on full blast.
excuse me while i go douse myself in absinthe.
@JennLee@datingish - No I'm not a film mjor. I wish. I'm not cool enough to pull that off =)
@AvenueToTheReal - Gonna check that out. Adam Sandler is my hero.
@Allie - @Tokimon - Not dissing on your movie tastes. I promise. I actually enjoyed Just Like Heaven and Kate and Leopold a little bit at the time. But looking back, I've found others to replace them =)
@black_lie - I'm a romantic... just not hopeless. At least not yet.
@Shy___Away - Most of my pictures take place in the Seattle area. Where's Boulevard Park?
@JunggleMan - I hope my post didn't let you down in any way. How about we have a movie marathon and you show me what movie love really is supposed to feel like?
@decipherme1 - What a coincidence indeed!
@booboo817 - Happy to entertain!
@nxaxzxixa - I really liked reading The Notebook. It made me cry like a baby. I'm not sure about the movie though. Maybe I need to watch it a little more?
@wynnw - Oh ok. It's in Fairhaven, by Bellingham. Just a couple hours north of the Seattle area.
Since I am freshly cynical again I completely agree!
Love, Actually.
My favorite love flick of all time, showcasing that there are all sorts of different kinds of love.
(I've found my movie love, and the best part is the lack of dramatic action and the abundance of harmony.)
i've never seen say anything. maybe i should watch it.
i'm with my high school sweetheart right now! i wonder if the story of our relationship will be another example of movie love... we've definitely been through a lot of heartbreak and drama and all that, but in the end we always end up together. okay, this is starting to sound way too cheesy. haha.
one of my favorite lovey dovey movies is dirty dancing havana nights. oh, and amelie is cute too. have you seen those? =]
mmmm, John Cusack -- good choice!!!
@onlyjustbegun - Yep. I have seen both of the Dirty Dancing movies and Amelie. Both really good movies.
And congrats on finding movie love =) I'm glad it's out there somewhere.
@wynnw -
You should definitely watch the entire thing! The end made me cry!
Anyone (and everyone) is lovable if they are given a chance.
A lot Like Love.... I absolutely love that movie! It is definitely up there with When Harry Met Sally (probably because they both show that there is a perfect time to marry that ONE person which wouldn't work out if you tried dating them at any other time)
I like those movies also (2 and 3). What do you think about Definitely Maybe?
I'm a sucker for chick flicks, but my favorite movie of all time is When Harry Met Sally...probably because it's the story of my life, however, I haven't gotten the movie ending. But...I still love it. It's more realistic than many romantic movies. As the person who commented before me mentioned, Definitely, Maybe is a good one too. There's quite a few movies that say, in a way, "Not matter what, you will end up with your best friend." All except My Best Friend's Wedding, which even though I love to watch, the ending still makes me mad to this day haha. Finding movie love would be so wonderful and ideal because that's how the movies make it seem, but unfortunately for many, real life isn't a romantic movie. Great post
I hope to find my movie love soon...
Great post ^^
i think movie love happens in the beginning..then reality hits
i am very cynical right now...going through a breakup/maybe-get-back-together sorta thing. it sucks.
@Allie -
me too! i love romantic comedies in general. they take me away from real life, and i like that sometimes =)
I love watching romatic comedies and romances, because I love movie love, eventhough some very unrealistic. I love to watch the process of someone falling in love with a person and the growth of a relationship. My favorite is PS I love you.
I TOTALLY agree with Sammi's first comment. All I could think about while reading your blog was Janice going "Chandler, the love we have...its like movie love."
See you in 30 minutes!
i always expect "the perfect ending" to come and reject everyone who comes into my life because i dont think its "real" ... when really what im imagining aint real .. i feel like i know i watch way to much romantic movies/drama but i also dont want to accept this fact. hopeless romantic? ><
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